Will Never Be The Best.

You didn't have to plead for I initiate the question in the first place.
You didn't have to arrange for I have become the middleman to stitch up every occasions.
You didn't have to feel inferior because I bought the bestest for you.
You didn't have to worry because you didn't have to face those rebellions for the years back then not the future years to come, because you have someone completely different from the others.
You didn't have to fear of bullies because you have someone who will always be there to stand up for you in whatever circumstances it may be.
A girl but like a man of the house, the youngest but like the pillar of them all.
Who would have been that matured to filter the happenings and settle irregardless feelings all by herself just cause she didn't want any worries to occur?
Who would have been so thoughtful to always make time for you, save and buy the bestest for you, listen to your sorrows and support you mentally even if you may not be on the right track, performing the right decision?

Eventually, all efforts reduced to become wastes.
Eventually, you never once felt proud, happy or blessed.
Maybe it's just so difficult to be your best.
Maybe that someone can never be of your fame.

I sincerely hoped that in your next life if there were to be, you wouldn't have to meet that someone anymore.
Maybe then you will be happier, maybe then you will always feel like you have all the best.
I have done enough, I have had enough.
It's okay if you do not feel happy, It's okay if all my efforts have just been rubbish. It's okay if there were not a single appreciation from anyone single one.

I have never once felt so lethargic, so unworthy.
You taught me how unthoughtful I should be.

In future, I'm not gonna do more.
Never gonna be....
I will never gonna be the best and so be it...